Rock Bottom of “At Least”

Leaving Institutional Social Work after Burnout

My non-profit worker friends and I sit over coffee or wine, and as we listen to each other vent about our struggles, we hear our own thoughts and feelings articulated. At lunch the other day, my friend said, “It’s like they don’t even know what I do, let alone what I bring to the organization.” Like so many times before, I exclaimed, “Oh my gosh yes! Me too!” A few times now, I have admitted that all I could manage in the evenings is Netflix, only to discover it’s the same for my friends. The list of people I know who feel used up, burnt out, exploited and disrespected is ever-growing.

Between swigs of wine or mouthfuls of sweets, we try to buoy each other and ourselves with positive thinking. “You’re amaaaazing. You’ll find a place that appreciates you!” we gush. I’ve said and heard the following many times, “Oh if it weren’t for the clients, I couldn’t do this at all.” We try to “silver-line” it by saying, “Well at least I get to write some of my own content,” or “At least some of my colleagues are great,” or whatever it is.

I am at the rock bottom of “at least,” but at least I know it.

Picture Description: A view of the sky from the bottom of a cave or pit.

My therapist — a woman with a day job in institutional social work — advised, “They don’t care about us. Don’t expect your workplace to care about you.” Every…